.:: NEW BLOG | NEW JOURNEY ::.

Hello! This blog is being discontinued. With my NEW weight loss journey on the horizon, I felt it was only right to start with a brand new home. I hope to see you there!




www.PROJECTPAULA.com










SURGERY ... yep, I thought about.

Lap-Band surgery to be exact. After taking an online questionnaire on a leading weight loss surgery clinic's site (to see if I would qualify as a patient), I passed with flying colors. 257lbs, morbidly obese, pre-hypertension, pre-diabetic.

I hope not to offend those that have taken this route, as I am fully aware that the efforts of successful weight loss, after surgery ... do not end on the operating table. What follows was just my thought process when deciding whether to go through with it in 2007.

I was actually kind of relieved that I had gotten that seal of approval, and was welcomed to join the clinic. YOU'RE HUGE, SICK, AND IN NEED OF OUR HELP!!! ... Okay, well ... they didn't put it like that ... lol ... but ... after getting the okay with my insurance company, I felt like I could exhale. Finally this thing that's bigger than me could be solved by a simple, least-evasive WLS procedure. I would lose weight! I could control how much I ate ... because access to my tummy would be restricted ... genius. So I thought.

I prayed about it, I talked with my mom and fiance who were both supportive. RaShad (who's 7 years my senior) told me to give it some more thought. "You're young P, I just want you to make sure that this is the last resort". Was it really my last resort??? I began my e-research on the subject, watching vids of the actual procedure, reading blogs on those who were pre & post-op, and rumbled through a host of other support resources and info ...

A day before my initial consultation, I had taken Shad's last words about the situation to heart ... I had an epiphany. I was 22, way too young to chose an avenue that I'd have to live with the repercussions of, for the rest of my life. Especially, when I knew (after evaluating all of my past weight loss attempts) that I had not really "tried". I failed, but I never gave my ALL to any diet or plan that I chose. I honestly didn't. I always whined that "that didn't work for me" when in reality ... most of the time ... it wasn't the plan that didn't hold up their end of the relationship ... it was ME.

To me, surgery wouldn't have been a sign of succumbing to "the easy way" (it's far from the easy way, my mom is 4 years GBRoux-en Y post-op and still has to work hard) ... moreso with me, it would accumulate to personal defeat.

I just knew that I could do it, lose weight without going to this extreme. No, let me rephrase that ... I had a strong belief that I could possibly do it, or at least give it one more flying chance on my own before I committed to a surgical journey.

I cancelled my consultation with the clinic, figuring that if I had the energy to schedule appointments, undergo physc evaluations and mandatory lifestyle eating/fitness courses, etc ... I could put that same energy into myself.

The weight would drop fast, sure, but couldn't be maintained without lifestyle changes. So, if at the end of the day surgery still boiled down to a lifestyle change ... I could do it without the aid or incentive of a scalpel coming anywhere near me ... or a "band" finding a home, around my intestine ...

3 months after the decision to not have Lap-Band surgery ... I began my "journey" ... hoping that giving myself just one more opportunity to do this on my own ... would prove to be efficient ... I'm not all the way there yet, but I do think I made the right decision (for me) at the time ... ;)

~PC